What exactly is self-care and why do we need it?

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Self-care is something that I try to think about and achieve as much as I humanly can. I am often seeing so many people talking about the importance of self-care that it truly shocks me that some people still do not know what it is or why it is so beneficial to them.

Self-care

What is self-care?

self-care are the actions we do that our for ourselves. When we maintain a good self-care routine, we are achieving it for ourselves. Improving our health, development and well being.

Is there anything that you do that makes you feel good today? Actually forget good. That is such a boring word. If you can sit there and say today my day was, what imaginative word would you use? Mine, my day was unique. My day was unique because only I had this day today for everyone else it was different.

I know how easy it is to become blind to the positives in life, especially when it comes to our mental health. Even when their good things staring at us right in the face, sometimes, for no reason at all. For no fault of our own, we let our anxiety or depression win.  In my previous post, I explained that its ok to be in a down spell which covered a lot more of this, here.

I have recently become addicted to those books, that I suppose fall into the Self-help category at Waterstones! (Not that I actually go to the actual book shop, it is definitely about Amazon Prime buying!) 
I love the quotes and inspiration that you can adopt from these books, sometimes I could be reading a few paragraphs of something, and think crap! this is me! Anxiety overtaking comes naturally to me. It is not just about the words, it will be ok, is not always good enough, and our actions influence everything, especially how we feel. 

Looking after your own mental health isn’t just about how you feel on what day, and it is definitely not about just talking it through, our actions and mindset put together to have a massive impact on our lives on a day to day basis.
These things I class as self-care for me, everyone is different, so although they may not work for you, I hope some of my ideas help someone! 

self-care

Types of self-care

There 8 self-care types and many different things you can do for each particular type.

Physical

Your physical self-care includes your sleeping, your physical health, what your eating and drinking, ways to rest and relax.

emotional

your emotional self-care covers your stresses, your emotional attachments, compassion, kindness etc.

Social

Your social self-care is your communication skills, your connections with overs, positive social media reflection, and your boundaries.

Spiritual

Your spiritual self-care includes the time that you spend alone, meditation & yoga, connections with nature, journaling and sacred spaces.

Personal

Personal self-care is your hobbies, getting to know yourself, your personal identities, and the ability to empower yourself to be yourself.

Space

Spacial self-care is the care you take into looking after your own space. The space you live in. The earth itself, by being sustainable and keeping your personal spaces organise.

Financial

Financial self-care is being able to manage your money correctly so that you’re not getting yourself into financial worries, such as splurging money too much you are surrounded by debt. As well as being able to commit to responsibilities of paying their own bills etc.

Work

Finally, your work self-care is the things that you need in your workplace, the things that help and improve your time management, workspace, learning and to take suitable breaks.

What can I do to achieve it?

There are a variety of different activities you can do to reach your own personal self-care goals. Here are some general ideas…

BUBBLE BATH, BATH BOMBS, CANDLES AND MAYBE A LITTLE WINE!

When it has been a long day, or when your feeling a bit down, or just for no reason at all. It’s more about the giving yourself time to relax, chill, and let any stress, threats or anxiety fade. 

BE CREATIVE

It doesn’t matter what your creativity is, always take the time to actually do it! It could be spending hours with your drawing books, or colouring pad, or something a bit more technical. I literally surround my self by different hobbies and crafty things, I love the feeling of accomplishment for whatever you’ve achieved, is enough. Plus somethings are a great distraction, like colouring! 

How about checking out how to make 3D paper flowers, here.

SURROUND YOURSELF WITH COLOUR, BEAUTY, AND YOUR FAVOURITE THINGS

I always say that my favourite colour is glitter, Its shiny and so pretty. It makes me feel content! If it is not glitter, it’s pink, it’s colourful. When you surround yourself with the things you love, you will always find something that will be able to make you happy. 

MAKE YOUR FAVOURITE HOT DRINK, IN YOUR FAVOURITE MUG

I have an obsession with mugs (and believe me this is no exaggeration) but I definitely have my fav, I love using. 

SPEND MORE TIME ON YOURSELF

Spending time on you could be absolutely anything, It could be spending an evening pampering yourself, with Hair treatments and painting your nails, to spending a few hours with your favourite book Giving yourself ‘me time’ is such a vital thing that makes us all feel good. As long as your going something that is making you feel happy, then whatever it is it’s a good thing! 

VISIT YOUR FAVOURITE PLACES

We like to have the Marwell Zoo pass, it is given us the excuse to get out and more active. Plus the excuse to take weekends away to visit other zoo locations included in the price. If it is not a zoo were visiting, its Bournemouth beach. We’ve created so many amazing memories on days just out and relaxing. Make a list of your favourite places and make sure you take every possible opportunity to go!

GET YOURSELF ORGANISED

My anxiety always seems to go out of control when I don’t feel organised enough, whether it is arranging something or just something general. Making lists, adjust your routine, using reminders, sticky notes, and updating my calendar always seems to make me feel better. I would always make this a suggestion when things seem to be manic.

What activities do you do for your general self-care? I would love to hear new suggestions.

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Why you should not be worried about being in a depression down spell!

At times in life, we all go through periods where we are just not ourselves. It could be for any reason. Honestly, it really does not matter what that reason is.
The problem with being an adult is life. life stress, life woes and just life in general. With everything that we face in our life these days, there’s no surprise that we face depression and go through times of unmotivated behaviour and attitude.

It is ok to be depressed when you shouldn’t be!

The last few weeks for myself and for Emma haven’t been that great! and that is me being 100% truthful. We have countless family and friends saying that we are being silly because there’s so much coming this year! which is so true and in no way am I denying these facts!

We have a wedding to look forward too in literally 6 months now. then there is the fact that we are moving house in 2 weeks. There are so many things on the calendar that I get confused at the best of the times. So why are we feeling so crap?
Well besides the obvious reason. The continued lack of immune system, our bodies fighting off colds and sickness that feel like they have been attacking at us for years now. Limbo seems to be a pretty hot answer.

Depression

Today I seem to have had a real big epiphany and it has really helped me. Basically its this…

It does not matter.

Yep pretty simple right? Why are we spending so much time trying to pull ourselves back to normal, when we have so much change coming and the fact is normality will happen by itself on its own accord.

Ok, honestly I have probably been told this by someone else. You know that dreaded word for me, patience. Sometimes I can be the most patient person in the world, other times I really don’t have it in me.

That’s the thing with depression and mental health, sometimes it takes us longer to realise the obvious. Which is so annoying! However, we really are all in a similar boat, going through very similar things. We just need to take time for ourselves.

Depression

What to do if you are going through a down period?

Remember that you are not alone.

There will always be someone that will be there to listen to your feelings. If you cant find a friend or family member to speak to, try seeking advice from a doctor or counsellor.

Switch off and get outside.

Sometimes a change of scenery can really help our moods. Getting away from the 4 same walls, and getting some fresh air in our lungs can really be a positive re-enforcement for all of us.

Do something that you enjoy

It can be so hard to feel motivated to do what we need to when we are feeling down. So stop and take a break! do something that you actually enjoy. Your motivation will come back when it is ready. I promise.

If you feel that you need help getting your motivation back up, how about checking out this post on Monday motivation here.

Try not to worry about the things outside of your control.

Firstly I want to point out the fact that I’m really suggesting that you try not to worry. I just want to make it clear that I know how hard it is to ‘try not to worry’ in fact, I am the worst for it. Who knows where I get it from but my brain normally races 500 steps ahead of where I am at all times. Constantly worrying when I am not in control. I am not being a hypocrite though. the times I have stopped worrying have really helped me regain focus, but it is ok when you can’t get these thoughts out of your head. You are not alone.

Write it down!

This is my favourite piece of advice that I stand by so often in so many different aspects of life. When your fighting depression and overwhelming limbo of feeling down you, write it down. What is it making you down? Write every single thing in a list, and then go through that list. Either by your self or with someone close to you. Face the list one by one.

Stop saying your fine.

Finally, it is ok to admit that you are not ok! it doesn’t matter how many times I’ve heard this phrase. We are all still doing the same thing. We are telling people that we are OK, and Fine when things are not ok. Be open to talking! take the weight off your shoulders! who knows you might feel better after you have admitted that you are not OK.

Seeking help for depression

Sometimes our feeling down spells last a lot longer then we would hope they would. It is OK to ask for help. It is completely normal to ask for help. In fact, I am asking you to seek help!

There are varies helplines and agencies that you can contact to seek advice. Such as the Samaritans.

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