20 things I’ve learnt in my 20s

So you never guess what next week is. My birthday. I am saying goodbye to my 20s and hello to my 30s. Oh my goodness, Please hold a second whilst I have a Rachel Green moment and refuse to turn the big 30. (that’s a little bit allowed right?)

In the same breath, I am really excited to be doing this post! because it is quite exciting as well to be reflecting on the whole of my 20s in general.

colorful pastel balloons
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My 20’s. Oh god, where do I start?

I’ve experienced a lot in the past 10 years when I actually think about it. I guess you don’t notice how much has really happened and changed until you reflect on a bigger scale like this.

I’ve had a variety of jobs, adventures, friendships, and positive experiences. As well of course my fair share of life dramas, masses of hospital trips and tears. Ive fallen in love, gotten engaged, started my own business, weve moved into our own home and planning so many more adventures to come. Yay.

So what have I actually learnt in my 20’s?

Life is way too short.

Life is about living, and we can’t do that unless we’re actually making the effort to live our lives. Do what we want to do in life, set goals, make adventures and create memories.

Instead of waiting till tomorrow, getting on with life and enjoying every minute is exactly the most important thing. Take all the opportunities to make memories and have adventures that you possibly can because no one really knows how much time we actually have to live.

Losing dad has taught me this the most.

Be grateful and appreciate what you have.

If we spend all our time looking for the next thing in life, then we won’t appreciate what we already have. Life is so much more when you appreciate what you have already. Being grateful for who we have in our lives now, appreciating the time we have with them and the feelings and memories they share with us.

Not just people we need to be grateful for, the things we already have. So many of us spend too much time worrying about our next phone, or the clothes in our wardrobe. The latest fashions and trends just take away from the things we already own.

Mistakes happen. But we learn from them.

Sometimes we make the wrong choices in life. Things happen that we didn’t mean to happen, and sometimes we make mistakes.

Mistakes suck, but as humans, it’s only natural that we make a bunch of mistakes in life. I have learnt that it’s OK to make mistakes, as long as we learn from the mistakes that we have made. Learning to accept that we have made a mistake is one thing, but the biggest lesson is of course is the fact we learn from the mistakes we’ve made and how to not make them again.

There is no such thing as normal.

Normal just doesn’t exist.

And if there is such thing as normal. Why would we wanna bore ourselves by being normal?

I admit that I used to say all the time ‘I just want normal’ but the more challenges I have faced, and things that I have experienced, I’ve realised myself, normal just isn’t a thing. My life has been crazy, weird, emotional, dramatic and so much more so far, far from any normal. (if there is one).

Being yourself is the best thing you can do in your life. Everybody is different and special in their own way. No one is the same. People can relate and have similarities but no life will ever be identical.

As much as it’s easy to wish for normal sometimes. It’s about learning what your normal is and embracing your differences and the situations you face.

Everything happens for a reason.

I used to get so annoyed at this one. I still do. Like it doesn’t make sense for certain things to have happened. Mum and dad have always said this though. My dad used to say it the most. Like a constant reminder whenever anything rubbish happened.
In fairness, it is not really what you want to hear when you are upset about something, like getting fired from a job.

We’ve come so far 💕

It really was something I learned when Emma and I started seeing each other. We knew each other before and we were in a situation controlled by someone else. (yep, The love triangle) The truth is if we hadn’t gone through the crap we did and met that person, we wouldn’t have found the love for each other that we did. So if that’s not a reason for something bad happening I do not know what is. We’ve been through so much together, and I wouldn’t change it for the world! I found my soulmate.

It’s important to do what makes you happy.

Why do we spend so much time sticking with things that aren’t making us happy? I have been a culprit of doing this so many times. In the past few years, I really have learnt to fill life with things that make us happy. For example Disney. Both I and Emma are Disney obsessed, We have so much Disney in our home, but that’s what makes us happy. From our latest obsession of collecting Disney Funko Pops to our massive amount of Disney bedding.

It pretty much comes down to fuck what everyone else thinks, I’m doing this because it makes me happy.

You cannot make everyone happy.

Speaking of happiness…

In a perfect world, everybody would be happy all of the time, with no issues, no drama, just positive attitudes and happy vibes all around. However, I think a lot of us can agree that making everyone happy is sometimes a bit too much of a challenge.

Learning to accept that not all situations can mean keeping everyone happy is a pretty big one.

I think it is a learning curve though. like I said before, In an ideal world we could keep everyone happy all the time, but over the years I have learnt that this isn’t always possible!

I doubt ill give up trying though.

Put yourself out there once in a while.

If I have learnt anything in my 20’s it’s to say yes to new opportunities whenever possible.

Not every opportunity will work out for the best. However by saying yes to something different you are potentially opening up doors for new things to be welcomed into your life.

I’m not going to lie. I am incredibly shy. My confidence isn’t always great, either. One thing my 20s has shown me is that if you don’t put yourself out of your comfort zone, you won’t get any closer to where you want to be. Like when I recently did my first craft fair, before I had I was making so many excuses. By grabbing the opportunity and actually putting myself out there. It completely changed how I was doing things and pushed me to start getting further.

when I turned 20, I randomly decided to apply for an outdoor activity centre to work. I spent 2 seasons, living away from home and certainly out of my comfort zone. It’s one of the best things I have ever done.

Not everyone knows what they want to do when they grow up!

I actually feel like this is a pretty important one.

If you asked me even now what I wanna do when I grow up, I would still say I don’t really know. Firstly because I would rather be like peter pan, who never grows up but in seriousness, who actually knows what’s going to happen in 10 years time? yet alone longer.

When it comes to career, mine has been a jumble! I’ve been a cashier, an outdoor activity instructor, a nursery practitioner, a door supervisor, a receptionist and a civil servant before my health changed things, and left me running my own business. I’ve loved and hated all the jobs I have had. One thing is for sure, I have never really had a career plan.

Some people are fortunate enough to know what they want to do and spend their whole lives working towards their plan. Not everyone knows though, and the biggest lesson I have learnt from many many jobs is, it is OK to not have a plan.

If you really want to achieve something, go for it.

I absolutely love goals. Setting them, planning things, getting organised. All of it.

I have learnt over the last few years that if you set your mind to something, and you work towards it, no matter what it is. You can achieve anything. It’s learning to erase the word ‘can’t’ from your vocabulary and changing it to, I may not have done it this time, but I will achieve it when I am ready.

Do things that scare you once in a while.

A couple of years ago I randomly decided I was going to abseil down the spinnaker tower in Portsmouth to raise money for Autism. I don’t know why I randomly decided to do that, I’ve never particularly liked heights, but I’ll never turn down something that uses a bit of adrenaline.

I’m not going to lie to you. I laughed hysterically the whole way down and talked to myself entirely (I’m so relieved my mum didn’t purchase the video)

And somehow, even though I didn’t like it at first, I was working at heights as an outdoor activity instructor.

Talking, helps.

I’ve struggled with my mental health from time to time for years.

Anxiety, depression and PTSD.

I have learnt over time that I need to open up, and I shouldn’t bottle everything up. I find it too easy to keep things to myself at times. I do not like the idea of burdening my issues on other people. Especially when everyone has their own things to deal with. Which Is ironic as I would happily listen to anyone else who needs to let things off their chest.

I find talk therapy a challenge at times, as I am shy in nature! but since I’ve been opening up more, it’s really been helping. So it is true what they say! talking helps.

Kindness goes a long way.

Kindness really does go a long way in this world.

Even the smallest of actions could make a difference to someone. I was always taught to lead by example, and consider how I would feel if I needed help or kindness. I bear this in mind all of the time. I do what I can for others without expecting anything in return and it taught me so much that if I can help someone my kindness can have a wonderful impact.

Cutting toxic people out of your life is ok.

This is the hardest lesson to learn, or well, I definitely found it the hardest to learn. Honestly, it took me years to be able to cut the most toxic person out of my life. However, once I finally managed to do this, the end result was happiness.

Don’t stay in a toxic relationship. whether it is a friendship or romantic relationship. It is absolutely fine to cut a toxic person out of your life, for your own mental well-being.

Love yourself.

Learning to love yourself is a lesson worth learning, one that we continue to learn daily.
the ability to be able to look in the mirror and say ‘’I love this person that is staring back at me”. OK, It’s not always easy but reminding yourself that you love yourself can improve your mindset.

when you stop caring what others think, you gain freedom to be yourself.

When you stop caring about the negative opinions of others it really does improve your mindset.

It doesn’t help that social media has had a massive impact on us when it comes to what others are thinking of us. Sad but true.

Its important you listen to what your body is telling you.

I’m so stubborn at times. I have always been a bit stubborn. I think because I am so often poorly, it makes me even more determined to get on with things, despite what my body is doing.

I have learnt the hard way, that if we ignore our bodies signals to slow down, it can make us ill mentally and physically.

It’s ok to ask for help.

It could be asking for physical help or even asking for the knowledge of someone else, either way, asking for help is ok.

And this is coming from someone who can be extremely stubborn!

asking for help doesn’t show weakness but the ability to work as a team and show acceptance,n to others input. Not everything in life needs to be done alone.

Invest in yourself.

Investing In yourself doesn’t necessarily mean spending money on yourself, although retail therapy is always a win in my eyes.

Investing in yourself is one of the most important things I have learnt, be it time in learning, self-care, or the occasional spend up.

One thing my dad always would say is, don’t skimp on cheap shoes. Your feet are an important feature, they carry you around all day, so why wouldn’t you wear decent shoes. (He would moan when I used to love a £2.50 pair of plimsolls from Primarni!)

Being an adult sucks and no one really wants to grow up.

There I said it. At times being an adult sucks.

Tell me I am wrong. I bet you cant?

Going from my 20s to my 30s, I already can say I would have loved to embrace just a few more years being 20 something, but you can’t slow down time, unfortunately.

I love to say how I would rather be in ‘Disneyland‘ right now, and cant we run away there? In fact, I say it all the bloody time. It’s true that when you are younger you can’t wait to grow up, but when you actually realise the reality of what being an adult is actually like, you suddenly stop wanting to grow up and be a kid again.

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Facing our mental health during lockdown.

There is a lot of posts and talk about mental health during lockdown right now. As someone who has been feeling the drain that lockdown has been causing, I am sympathising with you all right now.

I have been feeling in a bit of a hazed fog lately, wondering why I wasn’t finding it very easy to be inspired when it came to my blog and everything else. Shockingly for me, I posted once during January and although January slugged by so slowly. Time really had just disappeared from me.

We all knew that a lockdown during the winter would be alot harder. I mean during the summer we had the benefit of being able to relax and enjoy our gardens. Drinking cider and lighting the BBQ to keep us sane. Something that you cant do during the crappy weather that we have been enduring.

I don’t think that anyone expected to be starting 2021 with yet another lockdown, but it’s happened, we are here.

mental health during lockdown

We’re all in this together.

Not once during 2020, or even now have we been facing this alone, although sometimes a lot of the time it can feel like it.

Mental health during lockdown has become a massively important topic for both adults and children. Together the whole world has been struggling for over a year.

Stop feeling guilty for feeling down.

When you are in a slump of being unmotivated, guilt is bound to follow you somewhere down the line, especially when you know that there is plenty of things that you could be doing, but your motivation and inspiration is on such a low, that your clouded on what to do. It is OK! You do not need to be productive 24/7. Know your limits, and be proud of the things you have achieved, not what you haven’t.

It’s ok to have a lazy day.

Allowing yourself to enjoy having lazy time is something I have battled with, however its not a lazy day!

It is about rejigging you’re thinking to be able to remind yourself, that a lazy day is something that we all need at times, Like I said above, you do not need to be on the go all the time. It is

Surround yourself with things that make you feel positive.

My message to this, is literally as bluntly put as I can make it. Fuck what everyone else is doing. Surround yourself by the things that make you feel positivity. Each person is different, so it does not matter if something that makes another happy, does not make yourself happy. It is about learning what it is that makes you feel complete happiness, and filling your life with that thing.

For me, surrounding myself with creativity and craft is one thing I am absolutely passionate about, and there are so many ways to stay creative especially whilst staying at home.

Be kind.

Remember there are so many people struggling to get by day to day right now. We all have different circumstances, and we are all going through different things whilst being stuck in lockdown.

Kindness really does go a long way in this world. You never know how your kindness is going to effect someone in a good way. Either it is a simple smile at a stranger, that gives a welcoming friendly vibe.

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The Mind Post subscription box

AD – This post contains PR samples (Gifted items) but all thoughts are my own.

The box wasn’t lying… The mind post really did make me smile.

In this post I have been lucky enough to get to work with such a brilliant With getting the chance to collaborate with The Mind Post, I was so excited to read their hard work and support towards the mental health community with there brilliantly prepared happy post is such a treat to anyone who subscribes.

Mental health is something that we all face at some time or another, it doesn’t matter who you are. We all need to look after ourselves and our mental health.
filling your life with positivity if one thing I strongly believe can have a huge benefit on your mental health, though this is not always easy and life turns against us at times there are things we can do to help ourselves.

Subscription boxes are a brilliant way of keeping some positivity in your life.

This cute box from the Mind post is the cutest happy post you can receive.

The Mind post subscription box

In the first line of the about page of the Mind Post, they say ‘The Mind Box has been created to help children who suffer from anxiety.’ You can really see how the mind post has stuck to their goals successfully as they have achieved a brilliant source of self-care and wellbeing inspiration.

I received the Medium sized Mind post box, which you can purchase as either a one off for £14.30 or as part of a subscription for £12.99, which is a brilliant price for the priceless positivity that you are receiving.

What was received inside my Mind box happy post?

  • ‘I matter’ Red band bracelet
  • Strawberry and cream lollypop
  • Hand drew Self – Love guide book
  • Positive quote card
  • Positivity notepad
The mind post subscription box

One of the best things about this happy post is that it really does put a smile on your face, you can tell that a lot of thought has gone into the contents as well as the preparation for these boxes.

Receive 10% of your order with The Mind Post when using discount code ‘ALEXA10’

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Mental health in teenagers

TW: Post mentions depression and self harm.

Good morning Beautiful people! Today’s post is a beautifully written guest post by Demi Le Huray speaking about her experiences and thoughts around depression and mental health in teenagers and young adults. Demi is a young lifestyle and mental health at DemiLeHuray.com.

Mental health in teenagers is such an important subject that needs to be voiced and understood much more than it already is. It is fully

Mental Health in teenagers by Demi Le Huray.

Having depression at any age is super tough, however, I believe being diagnosed as a teen is very hard to handle. Therefore I am writing my story and experiences of when I was diagnosed with a mental health condition at a young age.

My diagnosis:

A couple of years back, I started to feel rather low and get depressive episodes frequently. I was constantly feeling down, so I spoke to my school and they referred me to CAMHS. After many visits and assessments, they were able to diagnose me with depression. Although it hurt, it made a lot more sense! My depression was pinpointed because I constantly struggled with dark thoughts, being positive, carrying on with day to day life etc. I have been diagnosed since starting secondary school.

What is it like?

Having depression as a teen, I felt embarrassed and ashamed. It was so overwhelming and I was judged by my peers in school. I got comments thrown at me such as “why are you always so sad.'” “you look so depressed.'” “why are you never happy.” “you’re going to fail your GCSE’s” and so much more… I felt I wasn’t ‘normal.’ I felt I didn’t belong there as I was considered different. It was so hard to wake up everyday battling with yourself and your thoughts within your mind. Nothing was ever enjoyable anymore and there was a lack of motivation. It was so hard to wake up everyday and keep on going. I was exhausted.

What are the impacts of teen depression?

My depression really affected my education massively. I struggled attending school, going to lessons, completing work etc. I found it super hard to concentrate in class and be able to learn at school. People often asked and made comments about my capability to do well. (Check out my post on Surviving school with anxiety! )

I found it hard to socialise with my peers and keep relationships, as I barely went out with or texted them. I felt it impacted my bonds with others and was paranoid they wouldn’t want to be friends with someone who was not the same. This made me feel I had to change, but its not that easy.

My mental health also affected my sleep. I rarely got any rest as I struggled the most at night times overthinking and feeling down. I tried everything to get a night of better sleep, but nothing worked. Whilst everyone was asleep, I felt alone. Night times were the worst! (Check out my post Tips on how to sleep 😴)

Having depression can also impact on your physical health too. I started becoming very insecure about my body and had gone through a eating disorder and made myself really ill from it. I lost a lot of weight, was in a lot of pain, I kept fainting, I was sick. It was exhausting! It wasn’t a nice place to be.

Depression - Anxiety, Trauma & PTSD Specialist Therapy


CAMHS was a massive part of my diagnosis and were able to help me through my depression. They were able to offer me courses and medication that has saved my life! The service are an amazing team that have been through my whole journey and supported me throughout it, with no judgement. CAMHS helped me overcome my eating disorder too! I honestly wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for them!


School has also taken a massive part in my diagnosis. The support at school has been absolutely amazing and have helped me get through my time of education. Make sure you find someone you feel able to talk to, mine is school!

How I have overcome it!

Now you have heard my story, you must be wondering ‘how did you overcome it?’ There are still many times I find myself down, but I pick myself up again using these tips!

Helping yourself:

I believe that one of the most important things is helping yourself. In order to see an improvement, you need to engage with others and want to get better. At the end of the day, it’s not all down to support services, you need to play your part too and work as a team.

Counselling/support services:

When battling with depression, I had a lot of support in place to help me. This included counselling, support from school, CAMHS and just generally talking to people that can help.


To help my mental health condition, I take medication. At first I wasn’t too sure however I wouldn’t be able to cope without them now. If you are thinking about this option, make sure to speak to your doctors!

Mental health in teenagers


Although this may not be for you, I find blogging really helps me deal with my mental health. It allows me to utilise my stories and experiences to help and inspire others which is what I love to do!

Mental health in teenagers


Going through dark times, I felt that helplines were really beneficial to me to be able to get out of crisis. I felt more comfortable using text services rather than calling, but do what is best for you!

Here are a few examples:

  • Hopeline Uk (0800 068 41 41)- this service is completely free and for under 35’s. You can also email them: pat@papyrus-uk.org
  • Samaritans (116123)- this service is free and for anyone. They are there day and night to listen without any judgement. You can also email them: jo@samaritans.org
  • Calm (0800 58 58 58)– this service is free for men who hit crisis point. You can also use there online webchat.
  • Childline (0800 1111)- this service is free for people under 19 and is private/confidential. If preferred, you can email them or use their webchat.
  • Young minds (text YM to 85258) – this free text service is for under 25’s. I tend to use this one the most as they get back to you reasonably quickly, are super friendly, you don’t have to give information if its uncomfortable etc.


Sometimes I feel that apps can distract me and help me through dark times too! Here a few examples:

Stay Alive- Free for any age.

This apps supports people to stay safe through crisis.

Calm Harm- Free for any age.

Private and protected app to help prevent self-harm.

distrACT- free for 17+

experts in suicide prevention.

At the end of the day, depression can be hard no matter what age you are. You all go through different difficulties. Here is my story and my tips for depression! If you have any other suggestions, what’s yours?

Thank you for such an insightful post on Mental health in teenagers, Demi.

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How to cope when leaving a toxic relationship.

Leaving a toxic relationship is not a mess that I thought I would find myself in. However, it did happen.

It took me a very long time, in-fact years, to realise the mess that I was actually in.

Being in a toxic relationship would usually suggest that you have been suffering some form of emotional abuse. Leaving you vulnerable, you do have the strength to get through this and later on find happiness.

When it comes to leaving a toxic relationship where you have been controlled and manipulated it can be very difficult at the start of your new beginning. It was nearly a full year before communication had stopped fully. Due to the complex situation, we had been in.

Photo by Castorly Stock on Pexels.com

The first few days after leaving a toxic relationship are the worst.

I got 2 hours to sleep the night I left my situation. leaving a toxic relationship took me a very long time to do. Being in what was in a state of shock that it finally happened, We both had finally got away.

I sat writing lists of everything I needed to do to get myself fully disconnected from the situation I had been in. and I, of course, was in shock, the fact that it had finally happened, and I had finally got away from living in hell.

The first few days, my phone went constantly, and I felt really overwhelmed. I was finally happy, but being made to feel misery still, by the constant harassment and pleading.

The first few days, are the hardest, but it does get easier to be stronger as you stick your grounds.

Things for you to remember when leaving a toxic relationship:

It isn’t your fault.

The first thing I’d really like you to remember, this isn’t your fault. Your drama isn’t a burden and things will get better. You never choose to be in this situation.

Stop communication

I’m not going to lie. The best thing you could do right now is to block all methods of communication from the ex.

However it isn’t always that easy. The chances are you have forms of tanglement that will need to be discussed civilised.

If you are in a position where you have had to leave a relationship and still remain in civilised communication keep messages short and sweet. As well as on point of what they should be about.

Keep a log.

I can’t stress enough how important this is.

If you are having problems with abuse, threats, harassment from your ex, you need to keep a log of this. If it gets to the point you need police help a log will be really useful to the police to know exactly what has been going on and when.

It can also be a handy reminder to read to remind yourself why you have left, if you ever need too.

Leaving a toxic relationship
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

Find the right support.

Having the right support around you is so important. Wether it is friends, or family, or even a virtual support group, there are places to find support in all circumstances.

Accepting support and guidance from others may help you build your confidence and attitude towards what has been happening in your life.

Speak out.

Speaking out about your experiences, helps you come to terms with them as well as find amazing support from all different avenues.
You never know. Speaking out about your own experiences could help someone who is going throug similar.

paper heart on light pink background
Photo by Karolina Grabowska on Pexels.com

Surround yourself with positivity.

Focus on you.

Its time now more than ever for you to be focusing on your own happiness and self-care.
surround yourself with positive things that comfort you and build yourself back up. It may take time. Your confidence may come back when you at least expect it to.

Eventually, have a laugh about it.

They do say if you don’t laugh your cry.

Everything happens for a reason in life. I believe that more now then ever. If it wasn’t for the situation I was in I wouldn’t of found true love with the most unexpected person in my life. From surviving to being able to complete each other. I know that I can’t regret the past because I would not of my my wife to be, Emma.

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Toxic habits that are stopping you from being happy.

Happy Sunday! It has been a few days since my last post! Life has been so hectic the last few weeks, and mental health has been on my mind a lot recently. With Saturday being world mental health day, I thought I would share some of the toxic habits that I have been giving up so that I can improve my own happiness.

So many times in life we are making our own obstacles that prevent us from being able to reach the level of happiness we deserve. These obstacles become habits, and they are toxic for our growth and wellbeing. Not all of them are obvious admittedly.

Making excuses.

Have you ever made excuses not to do something but really it was something that would have benefited yourself in some way. Therefore stopping you from progressing further in your life. I know I have. However, I admit that I regretted doing this so many times.

Saying yes when you really want to say no.

Simply put as stop agreeing to do things that you don’t want to do!

How many times have you been put in a position where you’ve had to do something because you could find a way of saying no.

Realising your ability to be able to say no is a massive window.

Toxic habits

Trying to make everyone happy.

I struggle with this one at times too. In a perfect world, everyone would be happy all the time. I would personally love to keep everyone happy when it comes to life. Wedding planning has been a massive example, due to postponing due to the coronavirus and having to make adaptions so that we can actually get married, I soon realised we can not keep everyone happy. It’s actually impossible there will always be someone that will feel annoyed and let down by your decisions. It is honestly remembering your own happiness and making sure your looking after your wellbeing before trying to keep everyone else happy.

Not making your health a priority.

I admit. I have learnt this the hard way. Even now I have to remind myself to stop and slow down at times. Your body often gives you warning signs before you become poorly.

By Ignoring the warning signs and not taking care of myself. And I am still stubborn when it comes to needing to see a doctor.

I used to panic at the idea of missing commitments because of my health. It was making me stressed and worse health-wise. Learning to put yourself first. Thinking of your health as one of your priorities is one of the most important things you can do. You only get one body! Look after it.

Surrounding yourself with toxic people.

Toxic people can become a toxic habit as you repeatedly allow yourself to allow other peoples behaviour to control your actions and mind. Your damaging your own self-happiness by allowing people around you to act in a way acting that brings you down.

You don’t need that in your life. Your beautiful and you have your own unique and lovely personality that the world needs to see! Don’t be afraid to stand up for yourself and stop accepting negative and rude behaviour.

Settling easily.

Who says you need to settle when there is a whole big world out there! Waiting for you to experience and live through new opportunities.
stop settling and work towards your dreams.

Mindless scrolling.

who else can admit they continuously do this toxic habit?

Now I am not saying that I am completely innocent when it comes to this. I’m constantly on my phone however I honestly would say it’s mindless scrolling and not phone usage that is a problem. Spending hours on your phone just scrolling through newsfeeds is doing a solo nothing for your positivity and mental wellbeing.

If anything spending too long scrolling the feeds on your phone is stopping you from being productive and living your life.

Doubting yourself.

It’s so easy to do, doubting yourself. Not being able to trust your gut instincts. But the honest answer is that you know. You know the right choices you should be making. You have the strength and ability to what what ever you put your mind to.

You just need to believe in yourself.

Depending on others.

When you spend too long depending on others you are not helping your own personal growth.
Work towards being able to support yourselves. Even if this is something that takes you longer than someone else. The happiness you grow from the feeling of succeeding in the end is the best.

Living in the past.

The past is a demon that every single human being is. I’m specifically taking about the regrets that we have and the failures we have made. It’s time to forget the negative times and start living the future. Ensuring that we learn from our experiences but we’ve moved on from them.

Comparing yourself to others.

Caring what others think.

It’s so hard at times to not care what other people think of you. But it gets to the point that we’re so worried about what others think of us that we forget what really matters. Our own happiness and the ability to enjoy life. We only get one life. Don’t waste it worrying about what others are thinking of you. Cause the chances are that they haven’t noticed your mistake, or even care if you like something that they don’t.

Not looking after your finances.

Money really is the route of all evil at times. We are driven by earning/gaining money, but were also depressed by not being able to afford what we want, having debts and always having a minus bank balance. It sucks doesn’t it?
I would suggest to anyone that they should look after their financial health from as early as they can. As money can have an awful impact on mental health.

Being sleep deprived.

I have to admit it, because I am totally rubbish at sticking to a ‘normal’ and reasonable bed time, but being sleep deprived, and not having a sleep routine is one toxic habit that is damaging your happiness behind the scenes. Although it is something I’m trying to work on.

Not getting enough sleep can cause you to be unable to concentrate fully. Lafargic and unmotivated. Which means your find yourself not able to function as well.

what are some toxic habits you would like to stop to improve your wellbeing and positive energy? Comment below what it is.

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COVID safe autumn activities

brown leaf

Keep positive during the pandemic with these COVID safe autumn activities.

Oh, I do love autumn.
I know I have posted before on why I love the fall. It has always been my truest favourite season. Does anybody else get completely excited when they start to see the trees leaves changing to the warm burnt orange colours? Those are such beautiful colours. Crunchy leaves then falling to the ground making the sound of an autumn walk completely. As I said, I love Autumn.

This year really has been massively negative for so many of us. The world seems to have lost its shit this year. So many of us are looking for positive things to do, keeping life as normal as possible.

yet again we are in a position where the coronavirus numbers are rising. So we need to stay vigilant and socially distance where ever possible.

So, in this post, I wanted to discuss the COVID safe autumn activities that we can still enjoy.

The official Autumn seasons starts on Tuesday 22 Sep 2020 and ends on Monday 21 Dec 2020.

COVID safe autumn activities pumpkin
My 2019 pumpkin

So here are my COVID safe autumn activities I am looking forward to!

Pumpkin picking

I wanted to start off my list with something that is a favourite of mine. So to clarify, Most if not all the pumpkin farms are still open. (at the time I am writing this anyway) Pickwell Farm In Hampshire is my favourite place to go when it comes to pumpkin fields. Going hunting for pumpkins is a brilliant activity to do with your loved ones.

Pumpkin carving

Now that you’ve got your hands on some Pumpkin goodness. Try

This Pumpkin carving set we have is so cute, and really easy to use to carve Pumpkins. Plus they are Halloween festive, to help you get in the mood for Halloween.

Roast Pumpkin seeds

This is the last pumpkin suggestion! I promise! but I do love pumpkins, as they just scream autumn. Have you ever tried to cook pumpkin seeds before. They are so yummy. Especially when they have been topped with a little bit of sugar before roasting.

Welly walks in the woods

A cosy walk in the woods, with the people in your ‘bubble’ is a perfect autumn activity where it is easy to social distance. Some woodland area/parks you can walk for miles without running into another person.
Take time

scarecrow hunting

some villages take part in a scarecrow challenge, and they are completely brilliant to take a walk or drive around to find. Some scarecrow makers really do go into detail with there straw men.

A cosy movie night

what better thing to do on a cold or wet evening then snuggle up on the sofa, with your pyjamas on, a cosy blanket and the tv remote in your hand. I love to bing on a Netflix movie night, it’s an ideal, cheap and COVID friendly activity. With Halloween just around the corner maybe you could put on a horror movie!

Tip: Add some Monin pumpkin spice syrup to your latte, to add some autumnal taste.

Doing things for your self-care is so good for you, any time of the year. Read my post on why self-care is so important, here.

Watch an Autumn sunset or sunrise.

The autumn sunset, a woodland setting, over some kinda lake! Oh there are so many beautiful places to go and sit and watch an autumn sunset.

If you are not the biggest fan of waking up early you can still enjoy this by watching a sun set. However some sunrises are so beautiful that if you get up ridiculously early just once to see it, it is worth it.

Woodland Photography

if you know me you will know how much I loves photography. I do enjoy nature photography as well as creative. Autumn is yet again my favourite season to take photos though, with its warm colours. Try Throwing some leaves in the air and capture a loved one, it makes a beautiful photo.

COVID safe autumn activities
Photo by David Bartus on Pexels.com

Leave jumping

Speaking of leaves being thrown. How about shutting out the negativity of 2020, and jumping in a pile of leaves just like the grown up child you are.

Collect Pinecones and konkers

If you decide to head out on that woodland walk! keep an eye out for a pine cone, or konker tree.

You can use your beautiful finds to either decor your house with, or even to make…

Read about my experiences with lockdown, here.

Autumn Nature crafts

Use those beautiful leaves, acorns, pine cones and konkers that you have collected on your woodland walks to create beautiful artwork and home decor to bring the fall feeling inside your home.
Pinterest has some amazing craft ideas for using natural finds.

Random fact: konkers are also known to keep spiders from your house in the colder months.

Turn the clock back

Daylight saving ends on Sunday, 25 October 2020, 2:00am. We gain an extra hour in bed! The best time of the year, when the clocks go back! a great chance to sleep for an extra hour, and gain a bit of extra energy for the day!

Bonfire night

It’s not just halloween that is just around the corner. It is also coming up to Firework night, AKA Bonfire night. Light a Bonfire, sit outside and watch the fireworks light up the sky. Although Major firework displays won’t be happening this year, you could still light off a few bangers in the garden.

The last time we lit our fire-pit we toasted some marshmallows!

Marshmallow toasting

Have you ever tried the Mega Marshmallows? Oh my goodness… If you are a marshmallow lover then you need to try these! Grab some skewers and hold these over your autumn bonfire. Then if you are feeling really extravagant, add some digestive biscuits, and some Cadbury giant chocolate buttons. Put the melted marshmallows and buttons in between 2 biscuits. You have then got smores.

kite flying

See! There are just so many reasons to love the autumn months. As the wind picks up on the colder months, use it to your advantage to find something to do.

Kites can be brought relitively cheaply, like this one, here.

Make your home autumn-ready, home decor.

An excuse to use the autumnal colour palette! Oh, and it is so pretty. Burnt oranges, reds and browns.

Light some Autumn smelling candles. some of my favourite candle scents to burn in the autumn are, Yankee autumn glow, Bad Geek Cedar and Jasmine and woodsmoke by Woodwick. Woodwick may be a little more pricey, however, the sound of the candle crackling and the beautiful scent really does make an autumn cosy evening on the sofa!

Photo by Adrienne Andersen on Pexels.com

Autumn photoshoot

The beautiful nature around in autumn really does make a good photoshoot! Grab your hat, scarves and gloves, and go find a place that you can take some warm, beautiful photos!

Organise your Autumn wardrobe

This is completely COVID safe as you don’t even need to leave the house for this one…

As we enter the fall season, it’s time to say goodbye to our summer shorts and dresses. Bring out the leggings, cosy chunky knit jumpers and anything else you may have in your Autumn wardrobe.
I do love a hoodie, boots, and leggings day. Not going to lie.

What COVID safe autumn activities will you be doing?

I would love to hear what you planed for for your COVID safe autumn activities. With how things are changing again it would be so nice to hear how you are remaining positive.

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Therapeutic craft projects to help destress.

This post contains affiliate links that if you choose to purchase from them. It will earn me a small commission at no extra cost to you.
knitting supplies and cup of coffee placed on bed
Photo by Flora Westbrook on Pexels.com

When it comes to feeling stressed, anxious or depressed. There is one thing that I like to do, that helps me with my mental health, Craft. Especially therapeutic craft projects. I wrote a post similar speaking about how craft has a positive impact on your mental health, here. However, I am now sharing with you what crafts really do help with destressing you.

There are a few therapeutic craft projects that if you have a go at, you may notice the calming and relaxing effect that crafting can have on you.

If your impatient and don’t like fiddly things, as they increase your stress level, I don’t think that you should give up on crafting completely.

Diamond Painting

I am currently waiting to complete this kit, here. I am excited for this one to be done and put it up in the house. Diamond painting is a great craft to sidetracks you for ages! I got so involved with the full drill kits that I literally would find hours go by before I even noticed.

Cross Stitch

Did you see my review of a LoveCrafts cross stitch kit, that I did during the lockdown?

Cross stitch is one of my favourite methods of stress-relief I am currently working on a rather large one that will eventually be ‘The lady and the tramp’ Spaghetti scene, from the movie. The repetitive motion is what helps you relax! I’m pretty certain. I always find finishing a cross-stitch project pretty rewarding as well, since it takes a while to finish some projects.

Therapeutic craft projects


Grab yourself some cute origami paper, load up youtube and teach yourself how to make some beautiful things out of paper, for fun! It’s completely relaxing to do as a project.

Cricut (vinyl weeding)

I love a complicated Cricut project for therapeutic craft projects! like a Mandala to weed or something like that! The more fiddly the more time it takes to weed, and I just find this action so relaxing. I often print out projects for the purpose of weeding for no reason! That’s me!

Therapeutic craft projects

Knitting or Crochet

Knitting & crochet I thought I would combine together because both crafts are so similar. You could attempt some knitting by buying wool and needles from the pound shop! that way if you don’t get on with it you have not wasted too much money!

As for crochet, I’ve been slowly teaching myself this one, and now I am wanting to have a go at a kit! My mum brought me the Crochet set by step book for Christmas, which made understanding how to crochet so much easier! Hopefully, I will be a confident enough crocheter to do a kit soon, I would love to have a go at making the Hooked unicorn.

Therapeutic craft projects

Paint by numbers

Paint by numbers, or even painting, in general, is a really relaxing hobby for distressing. I would especially recommend paint by numbers, as it keeps your brain distracted when it comes to searching for the numbers. This Cityscape took me ages and kept me calm whilst I was having a really stressful time!

Jewellery Making

There are so many different ways to create Jewellery. Whether its simple friendship bracelets, beaded jewellery or something a little bit technical. Making Jewellery is a really therapeutic way to relieve your stresses. They’re also a very good make to sell project!


Felting is one of those crafts that I have yet to master, I do however enjoy having a go. There is so many Dover craft simply make mice are so cute to start you off!

What therapeutic craft projects do you do to keep yourself from stressing?

I would love to hear what therapeutic craft projects you turn to, to help you destress when life is being hectic and crappy! As a crafter obsessed with all crafts, I love to know if there is anything else I could be trying.

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30 Creative uses for your empty notebooks!

AD – This post contains PR samples (Gifted items) but all thoughts are my own.

Does anyone else get that super satisfying feeling when you buy a new notebook? its so clean and exciting. I don’t really know how I became so obsessed with notebooks but I really do love buying notebooks!

There really is something exciting about having an empty notebook though. A blank canvas for your creative thoughts, keeping organised and just having fun in. I generally keep a notebook for everything I can.

I have been so excited to work with Old English Company. They kindly offered to send me a personalised notebook over to try out, (How cool is this! Personalised stationery!) When it came to actually choosing a colour and design it was so difficult to choose, they have so many brilliant designs.

Fancy buying your own personalised notebook from the Old English Company? You can receive 15% off of your order with code: OESPECBR15

After finally coming to a decision I choose a blush pink ‘My brain has too many tabs open’ Notebook. With ‘AlexaJade’ of course.

So to show off my beautiful Old English Company notebook I thought I would write about what you can do with your empty notebooks.

Things you can do with your empty notebooks…

1. To-do lists

Starting out with quite an obvious idea and something I’m honestly obsessed with, lists. I literally love to keep a book filled with everything that I need to do.

Something I do when I keep my book of lists of what I need to do codes each item with a symbol based on the priority of how important it is, (whether it needs to be done sooner than anything else).

2. Journal

What better to fill up empty notebooks with your personal memos. Documenting your life and expressing your feelings on a daily basis. I love keeping journals, I haven’t actually written in one for a little while, but I go in phases of keeping one and going back to it whenever I have a lot of my mind. Keeping a journal is so good for your mental health as well.

4. Gratitude log

Keep a notebook filled with everything you have been grateful in life. Every time your feeling grateful write the date is and what it is that made you feel this way.
Sometimes we naturally forget the things that we should be grateful for, so reminding ourself to be thankful is such a beautiful thing.

5. Sketches/doodles/art

Grab a notebook and a pen, and just start doodling away. Doodles are such a therapeutic activity for when you are feeling stressed and anxious. I’m always finding myself absent-minded and just filling a page of random doodles and drawings. It’s something that makes me giggle when you look back and you randomly see a doodle of something that makes you smile or laugh.


6. Bullet journal

If you read my recent post on finding the right planner for you, you will already know how much I think bullet journals are a good idea. And you really can use any empty notebook to do this with!

7. Goal tracker

A book filled with goals and milestones is a great way to stay inspired and on track of what you want to achieve out of life. Keeping goals is a brilliant idea when you are in the middle of a project, especially one that takes a lot of work. Goals help you stay motivated and accomplished as you achieve them. It is always rewarding seeing how your progressing.

8. Meal planner

Having a Meal planner is a brilliant idea for keeping organised when it comes to food shopping and what to have for dinner each week. As well as being a great way of inspiring yourself with different meals, when you can’t think what you want to eat!

9. Letters book

This one is perfect for those soppy couples out there. Even the not so mushy couples might enjoy this. Writing dated letters in a book to each other and then looking back on these in years to come. Writing happy messages of love, memories and feelings. Sometimes you can write down more than you can say, so a letters book is absolutely perfect for this!

10. Positivity

Keeping a book of positivity is a brilliant idea to keep a positive mindset. By writing things such as positive affirmations. Have a look back at your positivity when you are feeling down, and remind yourself of all the lovely things about you, including everything you like, and what makes you happy.

11. Handwriting practice

It took me ages to get my handwriting neat and readable, I found using a spare notebook to practise my penmanship skills, so helpful.
It is a very simple idea however so useful for improving your handwriting skills.

12. Event planning

Planning an event keeping notes, ideas, and plans. I found this so helpful when I was planning surprise parties. I made lists of everything I needed to do, everything I needed to buy and who I was going to invite.

13. Budgeting

A subject I hate, well hate is a strong word. Highly dislike. Budgeting is something that we all need to do to be able to keep on top of our finances. Giving us the ability to enjoy our money as well as being able to afford our monthly bills.

14. Blogging notes

Calling all blogger friends out there! This is one for you. Keeping a blogging notebook is so helpful, in fact, I go through so many notebooks making blogging notes, including post ideas, post planning, specific blog to-do lists, keeping stat records, resources reminders and notes when researching and learning.

Want to know more about blogging, how about checking my post on how to start your own blog, here.

15. Random thoughts

Have you ever woken up in the middle of the night thinking something, then it stops you sleeping so you go to add a note on your phone… then your brain starts waking up and getting distracted so your planning on your phone now instead of going back to sleep? Well, I couldn’t tell you how many times I have. Keeping a notebook by you is not only a way of making sure you actually see the note you’ve made yourself (instead of it being hidden on your phone to suddenly remember by the time it’s too late) but it is also a way of ensuring that your not distracted and you can concentrate on getting back to that beauty sleep.

16. Learning a new language

Thinking you need a new hobby? How about grabbing a notebook and writing our words and phrases in a different language so you can become a multilingual pro.

17. Writing a story/Poems or song lyrics

Use a blank notebook to completely get creative and plot and write a novel. Who knows you could be writing the next award-winning story. Or if story writing isn’t quite your thing, a book of poems or song lyrics. Whatever you decide, your definitely fill your notebooks up with these options.

Want to improve your writing skills, read how I’ve been improving mine, here.

18. Travel journal

Are you a lover of travelling? Why not start a journal of where you have been, what you have done whilst travelling and what you loved, disliked about the trip.

19. Recording your progress

Working on projects. You could use this space to record what is going well, what isn’t working so much and how you think you could improve. It’s quite rewarding to keep record of your progress in anything. Since you can look back and see how much you have grown.

20. Christmas planning

This is something that I love to do every year! Christmas is such a hectic time and so having a dedicated place to plan is a must for me. As well as being a brilliant use for an empty notebook, or section of a project book! I honestly end up writing out so many lists, including ideas for Christmas, shopping lists, what we actually brought and for who, as well as the food planning. Honestly one of the best ways to get your Christmas period as organised as possible!

21. Vision board in a book

I love vision boards, they are so much fun to create, and so very useful to keep. One idea for using your empty notebooks is to keep an ongoing vision board in one of your notebooks. Filling the pages with inspiring things that you would like to achieve as well as being a positive source to look through.


22. Passwords

How many times have you gone to log in somewhere and you have had to reset your password? I know sometimes there are apps and ways to save these digitally, however, it is not always the most reliable way of storing thing, as there is always a risk of losing your saved information.

23. Special memories

Journalling daily is not for everyone. Sometimes life just doesn’t give us the time to sit and write when we would like to, but keeping a book of special memories is a good way to keep down the special things that you want to remember in the years to come. Using your notebook you could spare a page per special day.

24. Shopping lists

Shopping lists are so handy when it comes to shopping. On the times that we haven’t bothered to write a list were left with a mess of buying things we don’t need, and things we don’t use. Wasting more money then we need to. So not only does writing a shopping list make uses for filling up notebooks, it helps you stay organised with the weekly shop.

25. Recording your dreams

Recording dreams is such a cute idea, sometimes our dreams tell us things that we don’t know, but our subconscious is letting us know. Writing our dreams down provides so many benefits to us. Benefits such as Reducing stress, helping us to solve problems, produce amazing ideas and learn from our mistakes.

26. Trackers

Pretty much like bullet journalling but just plain and simple trackers. you could design a tracker for anything. From tracking your habits, periods, to activities you have done. I have a book and a film tracker in my bullet journal.

27. Recipes

I love recipe books, however, I hate clutter. I like to keep all of my favourite recipes in one notebook. It is a much more convenient way, then keeping a recipe book and having to flick for all the recipes you’re never even gonna try to find the one recipe you want.

old english co notebooks

28. Health log

Keep track of what’s going on with you. A personal notebook that no one else has to see but is so good for keeping records of things you might need to look back at later. Such as when you have your periods, you can use the record to be able to work out your ovulation as well as notice any changes.
Another good thing about keeping a health record is if you are suffering from any kind of illness, you can keep a pain record or a sickness record, that may be useful to show to the medical professionals.

29. Inspiration journal

Keep track of the things that inspire you, whether it is pictures, words, quotes. Anything that makes you feel motivated and inspired. Almost like keeping a vision board in a book. Which vision boards are really great for keeping yourself positive.

30. Crafts and projects to try.

Another new idea for a craft or project? Jot it down in your notebook, with what equipment you need to complete the project. So it is almost like a craft planner. Which is ideal for when you are stuck for something to do. Brilliant for having an ongoing list for what you are going to make. Which as a crafter myself, I get so many crazy ideas of what I am going to make, so keeping lists of projects is a brilliant thing!

How about finding ways to stay creative with my post ways to stay creative indoors, here.

What do you use your notebooks for?

I would love to hear what it is you use your notebooks for? Do you have any random uses for your favourite notepads? and better yet, do you have notebooks that are just too pretty to use, or maybe you are like me and have a massive pile of notebooks ready to be creative with.

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